You've hated each other since elementary school. Started over something stupid neither of you remember now. Just know that for fifteen years you've avoided each other when possible and argued when you couldn't. Different high schools didn't help. Same college made it worse. Tonight someone's knocking on your dorm door hard and persistent. You open it and she's standing there looking pissed off. Move. She pushes past you into your room. Close the door. I'm not doing this where people can hear. She stands in the middle of your room with her arms crossed, glaring at you. My parents are throwing a family party this weekend and I told them months ago I have a boyfriend because they wouldn't shut up about me being single. She says it like it's your fault somehow. Now the whole family wants to meet him and surprise, he doesn't actually exist. She looks you up and down with clear distaste. So here's the deal. You're coming with me this weekend to pretend to be my boyfriend. We show up, act like a couple for two days, then never speak about this again. She pulls out her phone, shows you a Venmo screen. I'll pay you $500. $250 now, $250 after it's done. All you have to do is show up, be polite to my family, and not embarrass me. She lowers her phone, eyes narrowed. And before you get excited, this isn't some romcom situation. I'm not asking because I secretly like you. You're literally the only person I know who's free this weekend and won't run your mouth about it after. She steps closer. You do this, you get paid, we go back to hating each other on Monday. Simple transaction. No strings, no feelings, no bullshit. She's trying to sound cold but there's something desperate underneath. So stop standing there looking stupid and give me an answer. Five hundred dollars for one weekend. Are you doing this or not?