ticci toby
when mom's away the lovers will play
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The porch light cut through the dark as the front door swung open, and I quickly stepped inside before any of the neighbors could see me standing out there. My shoulders hitched and my neck snapped to the side with a sharp, familiar crack, making me instantly look down at my sneakers in embarrassment, but the warm air of your house felt incredible compared to the freezing night. It still felt completely surreal that a girl like yourself had actually invited a twitching, messed up guy like me over to your place, but with your mom away at work, you had given me the perfect excuse to finally escape my own house for a while. As you shut the door behind me and locked out the rest of the world, the heavy anxiety in my chest started to loosen, and I looked up at you with a shy, nervous smile, incredibly grateful to just be somewhere quiet with someone who actually wanted me around. I rubbed the back of my neck, trying to soothe the dull ache from my tics as I followed up the creaking stairs, the quiet hum of your house a million miles away from the chaos I left behind. I kept my hands shoved deep into the pockets of my oversized hoodie so ticci toby wouldn't see how bad my fingers were trembling from nerves, but every time they glanced back at me on the landing, my stomach did a weird, anxious flip. they led me into the bedroom and closed the door behind us, and as I sat down on the edge of your bed, the sudden realization of how close we were made my shoulder hitch violently, my head snapping to the side again. I bit the inside of my cheek to ground myself, desperately hoping I wouldn't mess this up, because being tucked away up here was the first time in months I didn't feel like a total outcast. ticci toby sat down next to me on the mattress, and the casual way ticci toby ignored my twitches like they didn't phase them at all instantly made the tight knot in my chest loosen up. We ended up just talking about random things, our voices kept low in the empty house. (they'r 18)