BSD chaos
Chaotic day in the agency
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DAZAI is sitting on top of a bookshelf, humming, and trying to hang a noose from the ceiling fan. KUNIKIDA is screaming at a laptop, his notebook pages flying everywhere.
KUNIKIDA:
DAZAI: Ignoring him completely
ATSUSHI enters with a massive stack of paperwork, looking stressed.
ATSUSHI:
KUNIKIDA: Grabbing Atsushi by the shoulders
ATSUSHI:
YOSANO walks past in the background, dragging a screaming GUILD MEMBER by the leg. The GUILD MEMBER is holding a bloody bandage.
YOSANO:
ATSUSHI:
KYOKA is sitting in the corner, staring intently at the captured GUILD MEMBER, holding a spoon.
KYOKA:
KUNIKIDA: Dropping his head onto his desk with a loud THUD
Suddenly, RANPO jumps onto the desk, knocking over Kunikida’s tea.
RANPO:
KUNIKIDA:
RANPO:
KENJI: Happily walks in, covered in mud, carrying a screaming, wriggling Port Mafia goon
RANPO:
KUNIKIDA:
DAZAI! I SWEAR TO—We have a hostage negotiation in ten minutes and you are currently attempting to turn the office into a suicide hotline! Get down!
DAZAI: Ignoring him completely
Hmm, does this knot look fashionable? It’s 'suicide-chic'!
ATSUSHI enters with a massive stack of paperwork, looking stressed.
ATSUSHI:
Kunikida-san, the police called, they said… uh, why is Dazai-san on the ceiling?
KUNIKIDA: Grabbing Atsushi by the shoulders
DON’T ASK. Tell me the report on the illegal ability smuggling is done!
ATSUSHI:
Well… I was writing it, but then Yosano-sensei needed a human test subject for a 'new medical technique'…
YOSANO walks past in the background, dragging a screaming GUILD MEMBER by the leg. The GUILD MEMBER is holding a bloody bandage.
YOSANO:
He’s fine, he’s fine. His arm will grow back. Eventually. Probably.
ATSUSHI:
…And then Kyoka thought the GUILD MEMBER was a cat and started trying to feed him her leftovers.
KYOKA is sitting in the corner, staring intently at the captured GUILD MEMBER, holding a spoon.
KYOKA:
Eat, dog.
KUNIKIDA: Dropping his head onto his desk with a loud THUD
I just wanted an organized office. Is that too much to ask?
Suddenly, RANPO jumps onto the desk, knocking over Kunikida’s tea.
RANPO:
Kunikida! I need someone to find my snacks! I left them under the... uh, somewhere!
KUNIKIDA:
RANPO! You have the highest IQ in the agency, find them yourself!
RANPO:
I don't wanna! It's too much work! I’m going to use my Super Deduction to find my chips!Puts on glasses
They are… with Kenji!
KENJI: Happily walks in, covered in mud, carrying a screaming, wriggling Port Mafia goon
Found a guy trying to steal the office plant! Also, Ranpo-san, I ate your chips.
RANPO:
…NOOOOO! THE HUMANITY!